This Must Be The Place

A new weekly series on the journey to designing a forever home.

May 02, 2025

We’re moving.

Not across the country, not to the suburbs, not even across the park. Just a few blocks away, and yet everything feels different.

I think that’s because this time, we know it’s not a “first” apartment. It’s not a bridge. It’s a home we’ll be in for the next ten, twenty, who-knows-how-many years - hopefully forever! And designing it feels like an entirely different sport.

I’m still the same person, still the same designer gravitating toward olive, indigo, lots of layering and texture, but my mindset has shifted in ways I didn’t expect. The way I’ve been selecting finishes, furnishings - even the little sconce in the powder room - all feels a little more intentional and honestly a little more free.

When you’re no longer designing with resale in mind - or durability for toddlers, or storage hacks for temporary closets - you can start designing for actual joy.

I should say: I love our current apartment. It’s been such a happy, layered, light-filled home and I don’t regret a single “good enough for now” decision we made along the way. They were the right choices for the season we were in, but this next chapter is different.

Here are a few things that have changed now that I’ll be settling in for the long haul this time:

1. I’m finally investing in the pieces I used to tell myself weren’t “worth it.”

Custom upholstery is on the table. Our current sofa is from RH, and our big swivel chairs are Lee Industries - both solid, serviceable choices. But they’re not legacy pieces. After nearly a decade of daily use, they’ve earned their retirement. This time, I’m thinking more about craftsmanship, comfort, and longevity - pieces that don’t just “work,” but get better with age.

I’m also saying yes to wall-to-wall carpeting in the bedrooms. The floors in that part of the apartment are currently unfinished, and in the past I might’ve layered temporary rugs just to get by. But now I’m not worried about what I can take with me to the next place because there is no next place.

traditional living room — In our current apartment, along with the sofa and chairs mentioned above, I also kept the previous owners’ curtain hardware and woven shades - not because I loved them (I would’ve preferred rods with French returns and cleaner, valance-free shades), but because it didn’t feel worth replacing in a home we knew we’d eventually leave.

2. I’m not rushing.

A forever home doesn’t need to be perfect in a month, a season, or even a year. There’s so much freedom in letting things unfold. We’ll live with the space a bit, get to know its light and rhythms, and make design decisions from there. No frantic filling of blank walls. No late-night manic low-ball offers on Chairish. (Okay, less of that, I am who I am.)

This will be the hardest part for me, for sure. I love nothing more than feeling settled and ensconced in a well-decorated space. But I think this waiting will be especially important in the living room. It's the heart of the apartment, and I want to get it right.

Cut once, cry once - *but only after triple-checking your dimensions.*

3. I’m finally choosing lighting like it matters.

In past apartments, I hesitated to spend on lighting - partly because when you sell, the fixtures usually stay. In our current place, we mostly went for affordable options: Visual Comfort flush mounts, Noguchi paper pendants and Shades of Light in the kids rooms.

But in this apartment I want lighting that feels personal, bespoke, maybe even a little weird. Few things transform a room more than light.

I also avoided hardwiring in the past, where possible. In the girls’ rooms, I used plug-in sconces to keep costs down and avoid opening up the walls. It worked - and the room is still one of my favorites, but in the new place I want to make more permanent decisions.

gingham wallpaper playroom — Practical choices like the plug-in sconces shown here were the name of the game. I loved these Herman Miller ball lights - playful and fun for the kids -but in the new place, we’re looking for permanence and a little more sophistication.

4. The kids’ rooms are built to stretch.

No themes. No nursery-coded furniture like changing tables or mini-anythings. Just real, beautiful rooms they can grow into - not out of. I want to play with color and texture, but anchor it all with furniture that’s sturdy, timeless, and flexible enough to work just as well at 17 as it does at 7. I’m approaching their rooms the way I would a client’s guest suite - with a little more whimsy, and a little less panic about rogue crayon activity.

This time, we also let the girls be part of the process. They’re understandably sensitive to the move, and we wanted them to feel some ownership over their new spaces, even if it’s within the benevolent dictatorship of my aesthetic (they get choices, just curated ones).

Gemma chose this wallpaper for her new room and I genuinely love it. Getting her involved made the space feel more hers, and less like a room she has to “get used to.”

5. I’m learning to live with “not yet.”

We stretched for this apartment, and while it’s in great condition, of course I see things I’d love to change (looking at you, bathrooms). But part of the deal I made, mostly with my very reasonable husband, was not to gut the place. The bathrooms, for instance, are likely more of a five to ten year plan situation. Not urgent, just... not ideal. And for now, that’s okay.

We’re starting with one project that felt essential: converting a dated laundry room into a proper office for him. That was part of the reason we moved - he needed a door and a desk that wasn’t in our kitchen. The rest can wait, or at least marinate. And that feels like real growth!

bookshelf — Our new apartment has virtually no built-ins, so the future home for my many collected objets falls firmly into the “not yet” category. For now, they’ll wait -patiently boxed, but thought of fondly (and longingly).

This is the beginning of a weekly series on designing a home with no expiration date. Next week I’ll dive into one of the biggest mindset shifts of all: Let There Be (Good) Light —on why I’m finally investing in lighting that doesn’t feel like a placeholder.

Until then, thank you for being here. I can’t wait to take you through it, room by room, decision by decision!

One more thing: as we settle into the new place, I’ll be parting with some beloved pieces from our current apartment - rugs, furniture, maybe even a lamp or two that deserve their next life. I’ll be hosting a sale later this spring (location TBD). Consider this your early warning!